FALLING IN AND OUT OF LOVE

It seems like almost every week we get a media report about another celebrity split or divorce. We hear about a new Hollywood relationship that has ended after just a few years, a few days or even a few hours. Though we rarely raise an eyebrow over it, one might stop to think, “How can they fall in and out of love so quickly?” “Do they even know what love is?” But let’s be honest, short-term marriages or serial romances are not just a habit of the rich and famous.  They just get the national coverage.

Isn’t it fascinating how a person can be so enamored with an individual one moment and literally detest that same person a short while later?  Let’s take a look at a few factors that might be attributed to these short-term love fests.

Foregoing the Test of Time

Not so fast.  There’s nothing wrong with falling head over heels in love. Go ahead, follow your heart but don’t let your common sense fall too far behind. Before instantly committing yourself to couple-hood, give yourself time to get to know your new love interest.  Sounds obvious, but sometimes we get caught up in the “love fog” and when it finally settles everybody looks different...

“What do you mean you like “open” relationships?”… “I didn’t know you hated animals, children and all sports”... 

Of course, we can never know everything about a person (barring a really good background check) but taking things slowly could give you an indication if the relationship is really a good match.

Given time, essential qualities like character, compatibility and communication may come into play, letting you know if this is something you should pursue or if you should head for the nearest exit.

Confusing Lust and Love

"How ya like me now?"  Often in a new relationship, we can’t get enough of each other and the attraction is irresistible.  Everybody’s smiling and all is right with the world. But let’s see how everybody feels about each other after we let our hair down. 

Will you still be attracted to that person if those butterflies in their stomach are soon replaced with heapings of Haagan Daz? Are you still going to think their unique “tick” is kinda sexy or will you find it utterly maddening?  Will their body still make you weak in the knees if their mouth is constantly spouting crazy talk?  Odds are, the relationship won’t last if you like them best when they aren’t speaking.  Lust fades but real love endures. 

Personal Pressures

"Can't Hurry Love".  We all want to have a special someone in our lives.  In our fast paced society, it’s hard to connect with people and when we do, we often want the relationship to last.  At times, even when we have a feeling it’s not right.  We may let our yearnings for family or companionship influence our judgment about a potential mate or cloud our true feelings about the relationship. However, real love isn’t something you can fake, force or create and when we try it only derails us from finding lasting love and happiness.  

Falling in love... Who doesn’t want that Hollywood-style love affair where we are swept off our feet and we ride off into the sunset?  But these days, even Hollywood actors can’t get that script right. 

When you really fall in love… no amount of time can curtail it.  No minor imperfections can derail it.  And when it’s right, you fall more and more in love every day. 

Go Cupid!